Merlot ponders

That in my last three posts I've mention not having found the right man yet. That's so pathetic. Actually, I was talking about this with a gentleman the other day and we both thing that the "partner" button is one of the worst buttons in SL. Of course, I can say that, but if he said it, people would just think he is... I believe the word they use on the mainland is... "player." (Although when I consider it, he probably is. *grins*)

I think the reason that it's been on my mind lately is because there really is more of a feeling of family in Caledon than elsewhere... and so I feel like I'm searching for a family to join, or create. This probably ties into my real life a lot as well, because of the adoption thing. We've been a year and a half into the process since we started now, and had two calls that didn't go through... so that reaching out and trying to create a family has started to bleed through into both lives. And I did warn that this journal would do the same thing.

So I guess that leaves me at a crossroads now. In my first life, I am in a perpetual limbo (which is ironic, because isn't that traditionally the place where all the babies are supposed to be?) It's the reason why I spend so much time on second life, actually. I work on my house, do the nesting thing, and await the call.

In second life, should I be searching for people to call my family, or should I be cool aloof singular woman with many distant acquaintances, who bops from place to place and works a bit here and there on little projects... which is basically what I am now. Or should I be looking for something different?

Heh, I didn't mean for this to be heavy.